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Can Being Happily Single Be Taken Too Far?

Earlier today, I stumbled upon a talk show that caught my attention because of the topic, which focused on a woman who had actually married herself.  I rarely am able to watch daytime television, but since I had the day off I was able to indulge a little bit.

I’ve heard of this concept of marrying oneself before, but only on an episode of Glee, which I thought was something the show’s writers had created as a gimmick to draw more viewers and cause a reaction. I didn’t realize that some people have actually taken the steps to have a formal ceremony in front of friends and family to show that they are so serious about staying single.

The woman (Nadine Schweigert) who was featured on the show made big headlines in her town for her radical decision. I wanted to find out more, and discovered this website which has more information about Nadine and others like her.

This whole concept of marrying yourself is so shocking to me that I don’t know what to really think, and have to question of these people are doing if for attention, if they are really serious, or if it’s just to make a mockery out of marriage.

If someone feels that strongly about not being single, I am completely ok with that decision, but just think a wedding ceremony for a single person is a little ridiculous.

I did pay attention to some tips from the show (I think it was Anderson) that were targeted at showing ways to be single and happy- but not necessarily going to the extreme like Nadine.

The show tips are as follows:

Stop singing the same song- The idea with this one is if you keep telling yourself you will be miserable if you are alone, then you will be miserable, so it’s better to approach it with a positive outlook.

Tell family to back down- If you are determined to be single for a period of time, or forever, it’s important to let the important people in your life know this decision so they will stop trying to play matchmaker if you don’t want to be match-made.

Redefine what single means- This one is the most important I think. Being single doesn’t have to mean that you don’t go out on dates or see members of the opposite sex, and you can define your single status however it best fits your life/goals.

Over the last several months, I’ve been evaluating how I view relationships, and have started to realize that being single or unattached is not as horrible as I once thought.

There is a certain sense of freedom you have by being single, as you no longer have to consider what someone else wants to do, and I have been able to be more spontaneous. If a friend invites me to go somewhere at the last-minute, the only thing I really have to worry about is making sure I can stop and check on my dog first (or in some cases he’s actually come with me).

This idea I have of purposely not getting into anything serious may cause me to miss out on some of my favorite parts of being in a relationship, which are the little things like having someone to snuggle with during a movie, being able to have someone always there and willing to listen to whatever crazy thought is running through my head at the time, and just knowing that at the end of the day no matter what I do or say they will be there to support me.

I’m not saying that I plan on staying single forever, but for now the idea of getting into a serious relationship isn’t really the top of my priority list. In the past, I think my desire to achieve the goal of getting married and having kids has caused me to make some decisions I wish I could take back at times. I still want to find someone to have the whole marriage and family experience with, but right now I’m happy just enjoying taking things one day at a time without worrying about being in a relationship.

What do you think about the idea of marrying yourself? Is it taking being single a step too far? Also, I’d love to hear any opinions about my own relationship reevaluation you might have.

 

One Response

  1. This is a really awesome post, and one I can certainly relate to. Society lauds the idea of everyone finding the person that is right for them–being single is seen as something you do UNTIL you find the right person instead of a lifestyle choice of its own. Although I think the idea of marrying yourself is a little odd, I can kind of understand the sentiment. So much pomp and circumstance goes into traditional wedding ceremonies–why not celebrate those among us who choose to be single?

    I really like what you wrote about redefining what it means to be single. I think that’s key. You can be single and still find a myriad of ways to connect with people.

    You know, when I first read this post, I thought it was really odd that someone marry themselves. But the more I think about it, the more I like it. I’m not at the point where I want to dismiss the idea of finding someone to share my life with (after all, I wouldn’t want to have to divorce myself), but I can definitely appreciate the public commitment to just be happy with yourself as a single person and let the world know you’re not ashamed of it.

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