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Should I or Shouldn’t I?

Over the last week or so I’ve been debating with myself over the idea of rejoining one of the online dating sites.

In general I’m not a fan of online dating, and have never really had any “luck” with that route before, but I sometimes feel like maybe I didn’t give it a fair chance the last time I was a subscriber.

Since ending my paid subscription to Match.com back in January, I’ve continued to receive winks and e-mails as my profile is still up, but haven’t winked back and am unable to read the messages.Sometimes I get curious about what is out there waiting in my inbox, but given the daily matches they’ve sent my way, and being able to see the profiles of the men who have sent me winks, I haven’t really been impressed with anyone on there lately.

A quick perusal of the daily matches I’ve been given over the last couple of days (and some new winks) has started to change my mind a little, and now I’m almost considering going back.

Some of the experiences I had last time are the underlying factors keeping me from jumping back in and signing up again.¬†Overall, those experiences aren’t really that traumatic or awful, but they made enough of an impression to make me overly cautious about meeting people to date online.

One of the bad experiences is quite possibly the worst first date I’ve ever had the displeasure of attending.¬†On paper, the guy sounded pretty decent, and like someone worth meeting.

The morning of our scheduled date, he sent me a message letting me know he needed to cancel due to a family emergency. No big deal, we would reschedule I told him, and was grateful for the heads up, so I could make other plans with some friends for the evening.

A couple of days later he called me, and since I happened to be off that day, I agreed to meet up in person later in the evening.

I’m guessing my availability on such short notice sent the wrong impression, because we decided on meeting at his house and then going out for a drink from there.

When I arrived at his place, he greeted my while in the process of drinking a beer– he stumbled a bit on the way to the door, so it probably wasn’t his first. It was a little disturbing to know that he was already drinking alone before my arrival, but it was his house and who am I to judge what someone does in the privacy of their own home?

Another thing I was a little shocked about was the fact that he was a good three to four inches shorter in person than what he had listed on his profile. I’m not super tall at my 5’5″ but I sure felt like a giant, as he could have been no taller than 5’3″.

Despite the height issue and the drinking before my arrival, I tried to make the best of it, and when he suggested we just have a couple of drinks there and talk for a bit, I went along with the suggestion.

Bad idea. By accepting this change of plans, I was then almost immediately propositioned to “take things into the bedroom,” and I quickly ended the date and headed home.

For some women, I’m sure that the idea of sex on a first date with someone who is barely more than a stranger sounds like a good idea, but I’m not that kind of girl. I have morals and value my own self-worth to not just give it up that easily.

Because of this particular experience (and some other dates and conversations that were just a waste of my time) I’m hesitant to even consider going that route again.

Did I reject the possibility of dating from online too quickly, or am I right in my assumption that overall it’s just more a waste of time?

 

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