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How I Lived Through the Worst Day Ever: A True Tale of Survival

Ever have one of those days where every single thing you touch or do goes badly… and the extent of epic failure almost becomes comical?

Yeah, me neither until one day earlier this week.

The events I lived through on this particular day made me start to wonder if I had somehow been transported into my own real life version of The Truman Show, because the type and amount of strange events I endured don’t just happen to normal people on a daily basis.

My first indication that I would have been better off staying in all day happened before I even got out of bed, when I unintentionally put my arm into the bubble claimed by the ferocious Marley (my mom’s Siamese cat that I’m babysitting for the week) and was promptly bitten. Luckily, it was just a warning bite and didn’t break the skin or even leave a scratch, but looking back it was probably a sign of what was to come later in the day.

Officially this was one of my days off work for the week, but I had decided to go in for a couple of hours and work on a few projects or help out as needed, and then run some errands afterwards that I had been putting off for some time.

The few hours I spent at work were pretty uneventful, although a close call involving my travel tea mug with steaming hot liquid (which is supposed to be spill-proof), my white dress pants, and my computer keyboard could have resulted in a catastrophic equipment failure. Crisis mostly averted with the spilled tea, I decided to leave for the day so I could take care of my errands and then get ready for the evening.

Errands “successfully” completed (more on that in just a second) and once I arrived back home, I decided a nice soak in the tub with a new book sounded like a good way to spend a little bit of my free time, and started running water.

It would have been a good plan if I had been paying attention and not left my book on the edge while the tub was filling. Distracted by something cute one of the cats was doing, I didn’t notice¬† Jasper investigating the book on the edge and subsequently knocking it into the water.

Since I don’t exactly have cat-like reflexes, I wasn’t able to catch it before one side hit the water, and instead of taking a relaxing soak, I decided to drain the water and dry out the book with my hairdryer. Thankfully, I caught it almost in time and salvaged it before too much damage had been done, and it wasn’t a library book or one I had borrowed from a friend, so no real harm was done.

Slightly disappointed that I wasn’t going to be able to read and soak, I decided to be productive and put away my clean dishes and the things I had purchased while running errands earlier in the day.

When I managed to shatter a glass while trying to put it in the cabinet, I was not at all surprised and just chalked it up to one more bad thing happening that day–just like I barely reacted when I realized the shirt I had planned to wear suddenly had a giant unrepairable tear in the hem, and settled on something else from my closet.

By the time I got around to opening up what I thought was a new pair of tights (cold weather will not deter me from wearing a dress when given the chance) I was however shocked, and a little sad, to realize that I had mistakenly grabbed some weird shorts thing made out of spandex that were in a similar package on my earlier trip to Target.  A frantic search unveiled a forgotten about pair of tights leftover from my dance class days (sometimes my pack-rat/hoarding tendencies are a good thing) that would suffice, so I decided to hold off on immediately driving back to the store to return the wrong item I had purchased.

Feeling like surely nothing else could go wrong, I encountered the worst and most devastating incident of the entire day just a few short minutes later.

While in the process of taming my often unruly hair, I somehow managed to burn myself and drop my flat-iron, all in one fell swoop, resulting in pain for my poor ear and the complete and utter destruction of the one gadget that has never failed me in the six years I’ve had it.flat iron

Seeing my faithful flat-iron laying on the floor in pieces immediately sent me into survival mode, but since I was already in a mostly undressed state (it’s totally cool to walk around in just a robe, right?) my options were pretty limited and for a split second I debated on following in the footsteps of America’s best female role model Britney Spears, and shaving my head. Before making such a permanent decision, I stopped to weigh my other options first.

Not knowing what else to do, I quickly snapped a photo and sent it on to a few friends asking advice on how to proceed.

The responses weren’t good.

I received a few with condolences for my loss, but no suggestions of how to make my hair presentable without the use of this trusty tool.

After attempting to pin the pieces not yet straightened back with bobby pins and failing, I decided the old fallback of ponytail would have to be good enough, and hoped that it didn’t look too much like I had given up on my appearance . (I really just didn’t want it to look like I was better suited for a trip to the gym than a trip to the movies.)

The loss of my hair straightener was the last truly terrible thing that happened that day, and I was happy to spend an evening out with a friend, and arrive safely home without any additional major incidents.

Even though I had been through some awful events during the day, and my patience had been tried multiple times, I know my awful day could have been worse.

A good night’s sleep and a new outlook (to be more careful and aware of my surroundings) were all I needed to make future days not be a repeat of the one bad one.

 

 

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